How can parenting be like coaching?

I've loved receiving coaching from my buddy Lisa Pachence, MCC, who's an executive coach for overachievers. She's so great at helping people have a great life, and she's agreed to write this guest blog. Lisa writes: 

1. Build in flexibility: If you think you have a process or habit set, remember it might change. Bake in extra time, space, and energy.
   
   
2. Set clear agreements, with self and others. Be ruthless about boundaries. I ask my husband for support and we plan out our roles as best as possible. I demand that my boss give my nights and weekends off - no excuses. At 4:45, I close my computer and pick up my son from school. Whatever is done is enough.
   
   
3. Create a reflective practice: Have "lifelines" to other parents who get you. REALLY get you. There are unicorn parents out there who have kids of similar ages, understand you as a human, and know a few tips and tricks. Find them, keep them, connect with them, and ask them to help you fill in the gaps of what you know or don't know.
   
   
4. Simplify - less is more: As in, use a toy in 1,000 different ways on a car trip because you've run out of options and your kid is crying. Or, you have 30 minutes for a project that would've taken you 2 hours before. Ask one question, or set one rule and leave it at that. It's enough.
   
   
5. Establish a plan: Trust the plan. Throw out the plan. Create a new plan. Have a partner in the plan. Let them plan. Stop planning.
   
   
6. Own your experience: Own when you're not at your best self. Practice stepping back, taking a breath, apologizing, getting on the level of your client or your child, and looking them in the eye, heart to heart. Practice taking full care of yourself.
   
   
7. Trust the process: When my child is throwing a temper tantrum, I tell myself, “This is developmentally appropriate, and it would be weird if he wasn't doing this.”  You can trust the process of coaching, trust the arc of the relationship, and always be stretching your coaching skills.
   
   
8. Regulate your nervous system: Coaching sub-competency 2.6 states, “Develops and maintains the ability to regulate one's emotions”. As a mom with a toddler tyrant who has epic tantrums, I try to remember that crying is a stress release. It's Wes's only outlet of frustration, and it's in his best interest to let it out of his system. It's my job to help him learn to navigate it and keep a loving, calm energy.
   
   
9. Go with the energy flow: Be the “Yes, and” in your coaching and parenting. A coaching mindset acknowledges the agency of the client for their own choices. Being a present parent looks like understanding and supporting my child's advocacy for what he needs (past what he wants).
   
   
10. Prioritize presence: Stop several times each day and take in the moment. If you're breathing, and your child is alive, then you are CRUSHING it. If you are present with your client, asking simple questions you don't know the answer to, supporting what's important, then you are CRUSHING IT.